Lifter

Winnning With People - John Maxwell

p. 47
"...George Crane's Compliment Club...was teaching what I called the Elevator Principle: we can lift people up or take people down in our relationships. He was trying to teach his students to be proactive.Crane said, "The world is starving for appreciation. It is hungry for compliments..."

p. 48
What kind of person are you?
"For years psychologists have attempted to divide people into various categories. Sometimes an observant poet can do a better job. Ella Wheeler Wilcox did so in the poem "Which Are You?"

There are two kinds of people on earth today;
Just two kinds of people, no more, I say.

Not the sinner and saint, for it's well understood,
That the good are half-bad and the bad half-good.

Not the rich and poor, for to rate a man's wealth,
You must first know the state of his conscience and health.

Not the humble and proud, for in life's little span,
Who puts on vain airs, is not counted a man.

Not the happy and sad, for the swift flying years
Bring each man his laughter and each man his tears.

No; the two kinds of people on earth I mean,
Are the people who lift, and the people who lean.

Wherever you go, you will find the earth's masses,
Are always divided in just these two classes.

And oddly enough, you will find too, I ween,
There's only one lifter to twenty who lean.

In which class are you?
Are you easing the load,
Of overtaxed lifters, who toil down the road?
Or are you a leaner, who lets others share
Your portion of labor, and worry and care?"

p. 49
"These are good questions we must ask ourselves b/c our answers will have a huge impact on our relationships. I think Wilcox was on the right track. People do tend to add value to others, lessening their load and lifting them up, or they take away value from others, thinking only of themselves and taking people down in the process.

...I believe the intensity with which we lift or lower others can determine that there are really four kinds of people when it comes to relationships:

1. Some people Add Something to Life - We Enjoy Them
They make the lives of others more pleasant and enjoyable. People who add value to others almost always do so intentionally. I say that b/c adding value to others requires a person to give of himself, and that rarely occurs by accident. I have endeavored to become an adder. I like people and I want to help them. I make it my goal to be a friend.

p.51
2. Some People Subtract Something from Life - We Tolerate Them
...what they do is usually unintentional...
...In Julius Caesar, play wright William Shakespeare's Cassius asserts, "A friend should bear his friend's infirmities, / But Brutus makes mine greather than they are." They do not bear our burdens, and they make heavier the ones we already have. In relationships, receiving is easy. Giving is much more difficult.

3. Some People Multiply Something in Life - We Value Them
But to go to another level in relationships - to become a multiplier - one must be intentional, strategic, and skilled. The greater the talent and resources a person possesses, the greater his potential to become a multiplier. This type of people, they value partnership, and always generating great ideas. They're passionate about making a difference. They help me to sharpen my vision and maximize my strengths. You probably have people like that in your life, people who life to help you succeed and have the skills to help you along the way.

p. 52
4. Some People Divide Something in Life - We Avoid Them
Dividers are people who will really "take you to the basement," meaning they'll take you down as low as they can, as often as they can. Dividers are so damaging b/c unlike subtracters, their nagative actions are usually intentional. As a result, they damage relationships and create havoc in people's lives.

TAKE OTHERS TO A HIGHER LEVEL
p.53
1) Lifters commit themselves to Daily Encouragement
2) Lifters know the little difference that separates hurting and helping
3) Lifters initiate the positive in a negative environment

p.54
4) Lifters understand life is not a dress rehearsal
- "I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again." People who lift others don't wait until tomorrow or some other "better" day to help people. They act now!Don't let another day go by without lifting up the people in your life. Doing that will positively change the relationships you already have and open you up to many more.